How to cope with Lockdown

I thought I'd share my tips for coping with the lockdown. Not that it's affected me or anything.

1: Stand at your bedroom window with the lights out and count the number of cars that drive past your house. Then subdivide the list into colours. If you see the same car more than once that driver is your new best friend forever, even though they'll never know it.

2: Scream incoherently at the Moon at least once a night.

3: Keep a well stocked cupboard. Those tins of soup and beans are your investment for the future and will soon be used as currency to buy new shoes.

4: Make a tinfoil hat, any style, to keep THEM from reading your thoughts.

5: Make several small holes in a big cardboard box and fill it with straw. This will be your bed for the next six months.

6: There is no level 6. YET.

7: Don't trust tomatoes. You never know what they're up to.

8: You must zjjcbdhfyf...... blibber.... bloik....

 

 

©2021 Lew Stringer